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Just Thinking... ☛
I think I had amnesia once -- or twice. ☛
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic. ☛
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. ☛
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. ☛
If the world was a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle. ☛
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free? ☛
They told me I was gullible...and I believed them. ☛
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to edge his car onto a motorway. ☛
Two can live as cheaply as one, but for half as long. ☛
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone. ☛
What if there were no hypothetical questions? ☛
One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people. ☛
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look like a nail. ☛
What was the greatest thing before sliced bread? ☛
How can there be self-help "groups"? ☛
Is there another word for synonym? ☛
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"? ☛
Is it possible to be totally partial? ☛ Is Marx's tomb a communist plot? ☛
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales? ☛
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off. ☛
It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one. ☛
Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it? ☛
Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? ☛
Is there ever a day when mattresses are NOT on sale? ☛
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with the hopes that something new to eat will have magically materialized? ☛
On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message 'one slice'? How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot? ☛
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give their vacuum one more chance? ☛
Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try? ☛
How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures? ☛
Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just disappear? ☛
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'Its all right." It isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?" ☛
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? ☛
Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and garbage is how close to the road the stuff is placed? ☛
In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? ☛
How come we never hear any father-in-law jokes? OK, it's a small mind.
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