Old Fox KM Journal

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

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Guy NoirSaturday, April 5, 2003
Listen

(GK: Garrison Keillor; SS: Sue Scott; TR: Tim Russell; TK: Tom Keith)

(THEME)

TR: A dark night in a city that knows how to keep its secrets, but high above the empty streets, in an office on the twelfth floor of
the Acme Building, one man is still trying to find the answers to
life's persistent questions --- Guy Noir, Private Eye --- (PIANO)

GK: It was April, which to many people would suggest spring, but here in Minnesota it suggests things you've read about spring. I was on a temporary job in Bemidji, writing term papers for a guy named Rico who owned the photocopy shop ---- (BRIDGE)

TR (RICO): Lemme tell you how this goes, Noir. You sit there and when the phone rings, you answer it and you say, "Lost and Found". Okay?

GK: Right.

TR (RICO): And they might say something like, "I lost my term paper on The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne. It was 8000 words long and typed double spaced and it was due this afternoon at 3 o'clock."

GK: Okay.

TR (RICO): And then you say, "Let me look around and see if anybody has turned that in."

GK: Okay.

TR (RICO): And you count up to five, 1 2 3 4 5, and you say, "Oh. Here it is. It was turned in by an old lady who found it on the bus this morning. How fortunate. Will there be a reward?"

GK: Okay.

TR (RICO): And they'll say an amount, like maybe $50, or $75, and you say, "That'll be fine, I'm sure. You can come down and pick up your lost term paper around two o'clock."

GK: Okay.

TR (RICO): And then you go online and find out some stuff about The Scarlet Letter and you write the term paper.

GK: What am I supposed to write?

TR (RICO): Well, that's what we hired you to do. Is to figure that out. (DOG GROWLING)

GK: I don't know why your dog doesn't like me----

TR (RICO): Him? Achilles? This is the friendliest dog you ever saw---- (DOG BARKS)

GK: Well, it just makes me nervous having him sitting there right by my feet.

TR (RICO): Achilles never bit anybody in his life. (DOG SNARL)

GK: He just makes me nervous. (RING) Excuse me. (PICK UP) Lost and Found. ----- Uh huh. Well, that's a tragedy. ---- Eaten by a dog, huh? ----- How sad. ---- Let me look around here and see if one's been turned in. ---- Anybody see a term paper on The Great Gatsby? ----- Oh, right. Here it is. It was found by a dog, actually. He brought it in. It's got some teethmarks on it, but it's fine. Might there be a cash reward? ---- Okay. Two o'clock then. (HANG UP) Oh boy. The Great Gatsby. I gotta write three thousand words in half an hour.

TR (RICO): Not a problem. Get some really long quotes from the book. Stuff em in. And then attack the book as a phallocentric product of a patriarchal colonialist society and toss in a little about Virginia Woolf and you're there. (DOG GROWLS)

GK: I could think a lot better if I didn't have your dog looking at me that way.

TR (RICO): Don't be so sensitive. (DOG SNARL)

GK: I just feel like he's about to rip a chunk out of my pants.

TR (RICO): Those pants, I don't think ripping would be the worst thing that could happen. (BRIDGE)

GK: So I wrote the paper on "The Great Gatsby" and Jennifer came in and picked it up----

SS (TEEN): I really, like, appreciate it. I mean, like, my roommate is going, "Hey," and I'm going, "Huh" and she's going, like, "Whoa. April." And I'm going, "Not." And she's going, "Whatever." And I'm going, like, "Arghhhh." It's like, Gatsby time, and I have not, like, even seen that book for like six months. It's somewhere in my room. And I am going, like, What can I do? Without a B.A. I am, like, never going to get that night job at MacDonald's and so I'm going, like, Oh No, and she is going, Oh Yes, and so anyway. Thanks, Mr. Noir. And now I have to be, like, going.

GK: Right. Jennifer---- let me just point out a couple things to you in the term paper ---- (DOG GROWL) Go sit down. (GROWL) I said, sit. (SNARL) I said sit. (DOG BARK) --- Jennifer---- take a look on page 3 where I talk about how Fitzgerald allegorized the dichotomies of patriarchal hegemony....."

SS (TEEN): Oh wow. That is so, like, powerful. There is so much going on there.

GK: Right down there. (DOG GROWL) Shut up.

SS (TEEN): ---- Right here? "The Great Gatsby is a prose allegory of good and evil that reflects the phallocentric colonialist archetypes that divide rural and urban, male and female, dark and light, caf and decaf, paper and plastic, and contextualizing these dichotomies in a vocabulary of implicit gender trajectories-----" I love it. I totally love it. That is so awesome.

GK: It's probably a good idea, Jennifer, if you actually read the paper before you turn it in. You know, to try to get some of those words straight in your mind----- like ambivalence----

SS (TEEN): Ambivalence?

GK: Right.

SS (TEEN): Is that a good thing?

GK: Well, yes and no. (MUSIC) An hour later, she was back----

SS: Mr. Noir?

GK: Yes? (DOG GROWLS) Shut up. Lie down and shut up. (DOG BARKS) What is it, Jennifer?

SS: It's about the, y'know, term paper you wrote? Like, on the Great Gatsby, okay?

GK: Yeah? What about it? (DOG SNARL)

SS: Well, I mean, like, the professor looks at it and he is going, "Huh?" and I'm going, like, "What is the problem?" and
he goes,like, "I cannot believe you wrote this," and I'm going, "What?" and he's going---

GK: Jennifer----- let me interrupt you here. I think the problem, in the context of what I wrote for you, is that in the term paper there are a number of different verb tenses, right? like the past, the future, imperfect indicative, the past imperfect, the subjunctive. You follow me?

SS: No.

GK: The paper is written in different tenses. And you, Jennifer, pretty much speak in the present indicative.

SS: What do you mean, I speak?

GK: No, you don't speak....you go.

SS: Yeah?

GK: Other people, they have gone or might have gone or could go
or will have gone, you just pretty much go, like you know, and they go, okay, and you go, huh, and you go, go, go.....

SS: Speaking of that---- where is the ladies room?

GK: Right that way.

SS: Thanks. (FOOTSTEPS AWAY)

(DOG GROWL)

GK: Go ahead and growl all you like, I'm not paying any attention. (DOG GROWL) I'm not listening. (DOG SNARL) I am not going to ratify your aggressions by acknowledging them, they are totally outside any context. (DOG SNARL) I don't even hear you anymore. (DOG LEAPS, RIPS CLOTHING. GK YIKES. A FIGHT ENSUES. (BRIDGE)

GK: And right there, in Bemidji, in April, I thought of
becoming a writer. Why write term papers when you could write the stuff that term papers are written about? Somebody's got to do it. (BIG CHOPINESQUE PIANO, CHORDS, THEN UNDER....)

She walked into my life one April morning in Bemidji. I'd been out fishing for walleyes and I was headed for Paris and there she was, leaning against
the front desk of the hotel.

SS: You Noir? Guy Noir?

GK: Her eyes flickered like the eyes of a pumpkin with a candle inside. Her Dress was orange the color of highway warning cones on a road you know you shouldn't go down, and it had a sort of subtext that I resonated to, or maybe it was her underwear.

SS: My name is Scarlet. Scarlet Anderson. I'm an associate
Professor of women's studies at Bemidji State. That scare you? Women's studies?

GK: I've been studying women all of my adult life, Dr. Anderson.

SS: Call me Scar.

GK: She raised the cigarette to her lips and as she did, (PHONE)
(PICKUP) What?

TR (RICO): What'd you do to my dog?

GK: He bit me. So I sent him on a bus to Duluth.

TR (OTHER END): Duluth!!??

GK: Look, I'm busy writing, okay? (HANG UP) I
could smell her perfume, it was the smell of orchids at high
noon.

SS: If you asked me to dinner, I would probably say yes. I would
know better, but I would. And if you kissed me right now, I might not be as horrified as you might expct someone with a women's studies background to be.

GK: I like the subtext of what you're saying.

SS: I've always had a thing about men and their subtexts. A lot of women have written about the patriarchy as if it were a bad thing. You're pretty archetypal, you know that?

GK: People have told me that.

SS: Your eyes ---- there's a whole mythology in there.

GK: I don't know what you're talking about.

SS: I think you do.

GK: In a sense I do and in another sense I don't.

SS: Try the first one. We call it, postfeminism?

GK: Whatever you say, baby. ----- (MUSIC) I'm still working on the book, it's coming along. It's the first detective novel to contain its own term paper, I'm proud of it. And it all started one April, in Bemidji.

SS: Now there is a dichotomy if I ever heard one.

GK: You want to talk about dichotomies, how about you come up to my place?

(THEME)

TR: A dark night in a city that knows how to keep its secrets, and there on the twelfth floor of the Acme Building is a guy still trying to
find the answers to life's persistent questions. Guy Noir.
Private Eye.

(MUSIC OUT)

Bitch Stole My Look?

Lima from Brazil

Breitbart

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Why Use a Sterilized Needle for Lethal Injection?

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The arm of the condemned person is swabbed with alcohol before the cannula is inserted.[12] The needles and equipment used are also sterilized. There have been questions about why these precautions against infection are performed despite the purpose of the injection being death. There are several explanations: cannulae are sterilized during manufacture, so using sterile ones is routine medical procedure. Secondly, there is a chance that the prisoner could receive a stay of execution after the cannulae have been inserted, as happened in the case of James Autry in October 1983 (he was eventually executed on March 14, 1984). Finally, it would be a hazard to prison personnel to use unsterilized equipment.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Fahrenheit 451 and the Flame of Liberty

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Senator Rand Paul discusses Americans’ continuous loss of liberty through the lens of Ray Bradbury’s dystopian classic “Fahrenheit 451.”

Saturday, September 08, 2012

CRS Report: “Researching Current Federal Legislation and Regulations”

Posted: 07 Sep 2012 07:57 AM PDT

By Elizabeth
The Congressional Research Service (CRS) recently updated its helpful report, “Researching Current Federal Legislation and Regulations: A Guide to Resources for Congressional Staff.”A guide to finding current legislation and regulations, the report won’t offer much that’s new for those who have experience with legislative search tools, but can serve as an excellent introduction or reference.
H/T to the Free Government Information (FGI) blog for pointing out the report’s interesting comparison of the information available through the Congressional Legislative Information System (LIS) and the publically accessible THOMAS:

One thing I particularly liked was the comparison on p. 13 of the “Legislative Information System,” which provides access to legislative information to Members of Congress and their staff, and THOMAS, which makes information on federal legislation freely available to the public. That’s right, one system for Congress and a separate system for us ordinary folk.

Here is a sample:

LIS	THOMAS
Best used for Finding the most complete legislative information	Best used for Working with constituents
Links from Bill Summary & Status display to CRS reports	No CRS reports
Links to Capitol Hill and selected outside sources of floor and committee schedule information.	Minimal links
Special advanced search capabilities	Advanced search capabilities only in Bill Summary & Status database

The House Administration Committee is poised to consider H.Res. 727, the Congressional Research Service Electronic Accessibility Resolution of 2012, which would make CRS reports available online in a free, public database. It’s likely the bill could come to a vote in the lame duck session. CRS reports play a critical role in our democratic process by providing key historical context and options for further action— as well as useful, interesting information like that in the report above. Contact your representative today and ask them to support H.Res. 727 for greater public access to this important resource.

Friday, September 07, 2012

PARAPROSDOKIANS (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right - only who is left..

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

9. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

10. Buses stop in bus stations. Trains stop in train stations. On my desk is a work station.

11. I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted paychecks.

12. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'

13. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

14. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

16. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.

17. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

18. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

19. There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

20. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.

21. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

22. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

23. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

24. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

25. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

26. Where there's a will, there are relatives.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Don't Axe!

A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates... As he enters, he asks St. Peter, 'I have a question that's haunted me all of my days on earth. Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'

St. Peter said, 'That's a question only God can answer.'

So the zebra went off in search of God.

When he found Him, the zebra asked, 'God, please - I must know Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?'

God simply replied 'You are what you are.'

The zebra returned to see St. Peter once more, who asked him, 'Well, did God straighten out your query for you?'

The zebra looked puzzled.. 'No sir, God simply said 'You are what you are.''

St. Peter smiled and said to the zebra, 'Well then, there you are. You are white with black stripes..'

The zebra asked St. Peter, 'How do you know that for certain?'

'Because,' said St. Peter, 'If you were black with white stripes, God would have said, 'You is what you is..'

Chris Christie Call to Mobilize

Watch it here: link

Arrrrrg!

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Praying at the Pirate Altar: Sweden’s Newest Religion

By LLMinc, on August 28th, 2012

File sharing remains ubiquitous despite the longstanding legal and enforcement battles the RIAA and governments around the world continue to wage (with varying degrees of effort). In fact, file-sharing is so popular that it’s almost a religion to some people– scratch that– it is actually a religion in Sweden now. They call themselves Kopimists, and their religion, Kopimism, is now recognized by the Swedish government as a bona fide faith. Even as church membership across Sweden plummets, The Kopimists now boast more than 8,000 members and show every sign of continuing to grow—having even applied to the government for the right to perform marriages and receive subsidies awarded by the state for religious organizations.

While a religion based on the idea that file sharing is sacred may seem bizarre, it is perhaps no stranger than the now years-old pirate political parties in Sweden, Germany, and other countries. Indeed,Germany’s Pirate Party won 8% of the votes in the North Rhine-Westphalia state election in May, giving them 18 parliament seats. In light of these successes it may be unwise to dismiss Kopimism as a mere joke or attack on religion.

Serious or not, it is fitting that Kopimism was founded in Sweden, the country where the infamous file-sharing site The Pirate Bay is located. The Pirate Bay is notorious for being resilient in the face of concerted efforts to take it down. Following recent rulings by a Dutch Court and Britain’s High Court, the governments of both countries tried to block the site, but the measures put into place to block it werecircumvented by The Pirate Bay within minutes.

Indeed, the numerous different strategies that various anti-piracy organizations, such as the RIAA, have attempted to combat piracy all seem to have come up short. First, they attempted to shut down the file-sharing sites and programs themselves. This led to the high-profile lawsuits like the one against the first widely popular music-sharing site, Napster, in 1999. When alternate peer-to-peer based networks appeared on the scene to replace Napster, the RIAA adopted a new strategy. In 2003 it began suing individual users for uploading copyright-infringing material as a public warning to file-sharers that there would be serious consequences for illegal file-sharing. After 5 years and over 18,000 file-sharers sued, the RIAA ended this campaign as well because it was having little effect on the widespread usage of illegal peer-to-peer file sharing networks. The RIAA’s lawsuits were so prolific that Wired Magazine reported a 50% drop in federal copyright infringement lawsuits from 2005 to 2009, and a drop of almost a third from 2008 to 2009.

If governments and other organizations fighting illegal file-sharing hope to make any progress, they may need to consider a fundamental adjustment to their strategy because right now it would be very difficult to argue that the momentum in this fight rests anywhere but with the file-sharers. They even have their own religion!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Doctor Howard Hurtz

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Crime in Progress

Found these jokes on a British web site and I wold submit that each one constitutes a serious criminal offense!

The Perfect Job

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned.....couldn't concentrate.

Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it...mainly because it was a so-so job.

Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.

I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.

Then I tried to be a chef-figured it would add a little spice to my life but I just didn't have the thyme.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.

I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.

Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.

I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.

I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.

I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.

So then I got a job in a workout centre, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.

My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.

I CAN'T WAIT TO RETIRE. I THINK I AM PERFECT FOR THE JOB!

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Poultry in Motion

John Cleese: Threat Alerts 2012 Europe

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.

-- John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person A final thought -“ Greece is collapsing, the Iranians are getting aggressive, and Rome is in disarray. Welcome back to 430 BC."

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Fueling Mexican Crime

Your tax dollars at work. link

Fast and Furious Oversight Committee Links

Sunday, August 19, 2012

PSYCHOLOGISTS BLACKLIST CONSERVATIVE COLLEAGUES 'The more liberal respondents are, the more willing they are to discriminate'

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... Radical liberals see liberal principles as revealed truth, admitting of no debate.”
“They are confident they are right and therefore justified in holding their biases and acting on them,” he continued. “The irony is that their policies are immoral (redistributing wealth is theft, affirmative action rewards inferiority and penalizes success); destructive (their policies corrupt the character of the people and undermine the productivity needed to overcome poverty); and historically disastrous (their policies exploit and tyrannize the people and ultimately destroy social order).”
He said, “We should be glad this research affirms what everyone knows informally: that colleges, universities, the mainstream media, and the entertainment industry are at least 80 percent Kool Aid drinkers who endorse liberal madness. Then we had better join the tea party and support other conservative causes that can get out the message that liberalism is a fatal disease.”
He said the alternative isn’t pleasant.
“If they don’t, we will all join the ongoing economic, social and political train wreck that is now Europe. In fact, Europe is the crowning glory of the modern liberal agenda. It is the inevitable result of liberal madness, applied to every societal institution at every level: economic, fiscal, financial, monetary, social/communitarian, marital/familial, political, ethical, moral, legal, educational, spiritual, and military,” he said.
“Europe is in decay because of its modern parental state and modern permissive culture, the twin arms of the modern liberal agenda. It is financially and morally beyond bankruptcy; it must corrupt its currency to postpone collapse of its banking system and keep governments from default; it is unable to defend itself militarily against anybody, or intellectually and spiritually against the encroachment of Islam; it is unable to maintain or defend philosophically its Western heritage of freedom based on individualism; its declining birthrate cannot sustain its dwindling Anglo-European population; and it is dissolving its culture in the secular nihilism and hedonism of la dolce vita (the sweet life),” he said.
“Other than that, everything is just fine.”

Monday, July 23, 2012

Dwarf Update

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All the dwarfes were in the bath feeling happy... happy got out so they all felt grumpy!

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Venus v. Mars

The Man Rules

At LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN FINALLY , THE GUYS' SIDE OF THE STORY. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT'S PRETTY GOOD.) WE ALWAYS HEAR 'the rules' From the female side. NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE.
Please note.. These are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon Or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for..
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE.
1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS. PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOTA COLOR. Pumpkin is also a fruit We have no IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.
1. IF IT ITCHES, IT will BE SCRATCHED WE DO THAT.
1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.
1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .
1. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS BASEBALL, FOOTBALL OR golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can - To give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can - To give them a bigger laugh.

On Sheep, Wolves, and Sheepdogs

This may be a good time to review this doctrine...

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On Sheep, Wolves, and Sheepdogs - Dave Grossman

By LTC (RET) Dave Grossman, author of "On Killing."
Honor never grows old, and honor rejoices the heart of age. It does so because honor is, finally, about defending those noble and worthy things that deserve defending, even if it comes at a high cost. In our time, that may mean social disapproval, public scorn, hardship, persecution, or as always,even death itself. The question remains: What is worth defending? What is worth dying for? What is worth living for? - William J. Bennett - in a lecture to the United States Naval Academy November 24, 1997
One Vietnam veteran, an old retired colonel, once said this to me:
"Most of the people in our society are sheep. They are kind, gentle, productive creatures who can only hurt one another by accident." This is true. Remember, the murder rate is six per 100,000 per year, and the aggravated assault rate is four per 1,000 per year. What this means is that the vast majority of Americans are not inclined to hurt one another. Some estimates say that two million Americans are victims of violent crimes every year, a tragic, staggering number, perhaps an all-time record rate of violent crime. But there are almost 300 million Americans, which means that the odds of being a victim of violent crime is considerably less than one in a hundred on any given year. Furthermore, since many violent crimes are committed by repeat offenders, the actual number of violent citizens is considerably less than two million.
Thus there is a paradox, and we must grasp both ends of the situation: We may well be in the most violent times in history, but violence is still remarkably rare. This is because most citizens are kind, decent people who are not capable of hurting each other, except by accident or under extreme provocation. They are sheep.
I mean nothing negative by calling them sheep. To me it is like the pretty, blue robin's egg. Inside it is soft and gooey but someday it will grow into something wonderful. But the egg cannot survive without its hard blue shell. Police officers, soldiers, and other warriors are like that shell, and someday the civilization they protect will grow into something wonderful.? For now, though, they need warriors to protect them from the predators.
"Then there are sheepdogs," he went on, "and I'm a sheepdog. I live to protect the flock and confront the wolf."
If ... read on>

Saturday, July 21, 2012

$4,200 millions of Your tax payment.

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The Internal Revenue Service allowed undocumented workers to collect $4.2 billion in refundable tax credits last year, a new audit says, almost quadruple the sum five years ago.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Oooohmmmm

‎"You are a real pisser, Your Holiness!"
"That's Nehru, you are thinking of, Your Royal Highness, not me!"

What Competition?

Not "unfair" or "deceptive" but "unhealthy!"

Police sting shuts down $1 bus service from Queens to Manhattan

Read it here

The unlicensed buses were “bad for the community,” said Dian Yu, executive director of the Downtown Flushing Transit Hub Business Improvement District. “It creates an unhealthy competition.”

My dear friends: Do you not yet realize that the Government is our Enemy?

Saturday, June 30, 2012

A man had two of the best tickets for the Champion League Cup Final. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.

"No", he says, "the seat is empty."

"This is incredible!" said the man, "who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Champion League Cup Final, the biggest sporting event of the year, and not use it?"

He says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Final we haven't been to together since we got married."

"Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. I guess you couldn't find someone else, a friend or relative or even a neighbour to take the seat?"

The man shakes his head... "No. They're all at the funeral."